MaxineNakayla

Sunday, January 31, 2010

I'm actually looking forward to school.

♥ 9:37 PM

He downloaded Lady Gaga.
He has so much more credibility in my books now
<3

♥ 4:53 PM

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Like candles in the city, they never looked so pretty

♥ 7:46 PM

We think the same things at the same time

We just cant do anything about it

♥ 7:43 PM

It's relentless. Invisible. Indefatigable. Indisputable. Undeniable

So how come it looks so beautiful? How come the moon falls from the sky?

I can see you, but I can never reach you.

♥ 7:36 PM

I apologize for not having much to say.
I've been sick the past few days.
Today my dog killed my flemish giant. ;(

♥ 3:51 PM

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

♥ 1:22 AM

♥ 1:19 AM

YOU DONT KNOW MY NAME.
You dont know who I am.

You dont know who I will be.

♥ 1:17 AM

Trust Alex that we'd go to town for her to get stationary
and we end up with a bunny and leopard.

♥ 1:14 AM

I have so much to say.
I have no idea who to tell,
or where to start.
But I am so lost.

♥ 1:10 AM

Monday, January 25, 2010

And I just can’t pull myself away,
under his spell I can't break.
I just cant stop.
And I just can’t bring myself away,
but I don’t want to escape.

♥ 4:03 AM

I'm coming out of my cage and I've been doing just fine, gotta gotta be down because I want it all. It started out with a kiss how did it end up like this, itt was only a kiss, it was only a kiss. Now I'm falling asleep and she's calling a cab while he's having a smoke and she's taking a drag. Now they're going to bed and my stomach is sick, and it's all in my head but she's touching his chest. now, he takes off her dress now, let me go. I just can't look its killing me and taking control. Jealousy, turning saints into the sea, swimming through sick lullabies. Choking on your alibis but it's just the price I pay. Destiny is calling me open up my eager eyes, Cause I'm Mr Brightside.

♥ 3:59 AM

And so I think if hes still going out and drinking while I'm at home with my younger sister and her ginger boyfriend, its okay for me to move on. And I think that if I'm on bebo after midnight doing those lame quizzes, I deserve to get out of the house. And I think that if I'm blogging about moving on and getting out of the house at 3.50am, I should probably pick my life up rather soon.

♥ 3:51 AM

Sunday, January 24, 2010

''Maxine, you're typing louding again, why are you angry''
I love how people can tell my emotions from how I am typing.

♥ 10:26 PM

Saturday, January 23, 2010

i will learn when i hurt myself.

♥ 6:03 PM

Friday, January 22, 2010

I NEVER SAID
I WAS A GOOD PERSON

♥ 8:39 PM

Today was a lovely day.
Felipe, is wonderful. I'll cherish my pretty ring and necklace.
& Christie made me go Awww really loudly.
AND! I also made an awesome song in the 'love dungeon'

♥ 8:28 PM

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Christie, I am a fan.

♥ 1:26 PM

New obsession with 60s/70s
even though i dont look it :P

♥ 12:40 AM

So. Now its over over.
It'll still take awhile to move on though.

♥ 12:36 AM

Jay says (12:19 a.m.):

you dont know how many people have told me
they want to rip my balls out/kill me/smash me,
and irl they dont do anything

'Maxine says (12:19 a.m.):

except for me :)

Jay says (12:20 a.m.):

yup your cool enough to stand up for yourself
i will never get on your badside again, you will explode yo

♥ 12:30 AM

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

♥ 11:23 PM

Monday, January 18, 2010

Now isolation can be sweet, no juvenile delinquent heat, I don't have to tell ya where i'm coming from, if i leave my cat suit on. Now the air is getting thin, you make my senses start to spin, it's just a suicidal whim but i can't resist, an emotional thing.

♥ 8:41 PM

Give me some sunshine please.

♥ 8:39 PM

Tyrone - I've been wearing your necklace everyday.

♥ 8:35 PM

I'm depressed. I'v been fucking three guys round, and its hurting me more than them. I shouldnt complain that I've got three guys that wanna be with me, but, I am. I don't know what to do. I'm back at square one.

♥ 8:32 PM

So. Gemma said that her friends found my blog link, and have been reading my writing. She said that they say they all feel sorry for me. I dont write what I do cause I want people to feel sorry for me, I write it cause I dont have anyone else I can talk to. Thanks for taking the time to read my life story though.

♥ 8:28 PM

Dear blogger, I am sorry if it has seemed I have abandoned you.
It is not that I have magically gotten a life all of a sudden. According to my father I'm depressed, and thats why I've spent the past 2weeks watching Disney Channel and E! with a tub of ice cream each day.
I've gotten chubby.

♥ 8:25 PM

Friday, January 15, 2010

Our family photo has cobwebs on it.

♥ 2:45 PM

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

When we were growing up you always looked like you were having such fun. You always were and you always will be the taller and the prettier one. People seem to love you. They gravitate towards you. That's why I started to hate you so much.
And I just completely ignored you.

I don't know why I felt the need to keep it up for oh so long. It's all my fault I'm sorry you did absolutely nothing wrong. I don't know why I felt the need to drag it out for all these years. All the pain I've caused you. The constant flow of all the tears. Believe me when I say that I cannot apologise enough. When all you ever wanted from me was a token of my love. And if it's not too late, could you please find it deep within your heart to try and go back go back to the start. Go back to the start.

♥ 10:24 PM

Ever since he can remember people have died in his good name. Long before that September. Long before hijacking planes. He's lost the will he can't decide. He doesn't know who's right or wrong. But there's one thing that he's sure of, this has been going on too long.

♥ 10:16 PM

Since you've gone I've lost a chip on my shoulder,
Since you've gone I feel like I've gotten older,
And now you've gone it feels as if the whole wide world is my stage
And now you've gone it's like I've been let out of my cage.

♥ 10:13 PM

I could say, that i'll always be here for you
but that would be a lie, and quite a pointless thing to do.

♥ 10:10 PM

'Til the man of her dreams comes along
Picks her up and puts her over his shoulder
It seems so unlikely in this day and age

♥ 9:58 PM

Shes thinking how did i get here,
And wondering, why.

♥ 9:51 PM

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Considering dark hair again?

♥ 8:54 PM

And how are you today? What have you been doing?
Hiding in your room all day?

Yes I've been fucking hiding. Do you remember how this is New Zealand? and theres no war here? I don't wanna come out into my own fucking living room and have my head blown off. Thankyou. Please, refrain from asking me about my life from now on, coming home for an hour after being at your other sons a week and asking how my boyfriend is, when we've been broken up for bout a week now doesnt make up for everything. It doesnt make things okay. It doesnt erase the fact that you've just spent the past two days making my mum practically cry. It doesnt just fix everything. You can pretend. But Im not going to forget.

IN FACT! Yes. There you go. YOU ALWAYS PRETEND THAT EVERYTHING IS OKAY! You make it seem as if nothing ever happened, because mum is so keen to just forgive you so life can go on. Just because she can pretend, doesnt mean im going to forget. Do you remember eight years ago when you attacked her in the kitchen and we had to repaint the whole kitchen cause you totally destroyed it? Do you remember when you almost broke Tamaras arm? Im sure you do remember. Your just keen to live in your own fantasy where we all respect you. Think again.

I know this is really horrible.
But I wish you had to stay in hospital and never came back here.

♥ 8:40 PM

I was alone, I was tired but now im bound
My head is off the ground
For a long time I was so weary
Tired of the sound, I've heard before
Knowing of the nights im out the door
Haunted by the things i've made
Stuck between the burning light and the dusty shade

♥ 8:28 PM

Monday, January 11, 2010

/butterflies

♥ 10:09 PM

!!*%)^#$%&@#$@_#$%^@#%_)%^&#@%@$$#^$$@_@#(&

STOP SAYING 'DAD DAD DAD DAD DAD DAD DAD'
Hes gone Ricky. SHUT UP.

♥ 7:06 PM

The slam of the front door,
the squeal of him calling mum a whore,
the sound of the tyres burning down the street.
The loud ringing noise of mumma's phone beep.

Hey. that was a good effort for on the spot!

♥ 6:59 PM

Saturday, January 9, 2010

The pain in my body right now..
the stabbing in my gut.. pressing down on my woman parts
the feeling of my stomach being squished up and ringed out
the tightness in my throat, feeling blocked so no air will pass.

NOT BEARABLE. LEAVE NOW.

♥ 10:40 PM

I don't know what Jessie thought of The Lovely Bones,
but I had to stop myself from almost crying many times.
When all of his victims came to the tree, and Holly showed up..
So sad.

♥ 10:36 PM

Friday, January 8, 2010

So, you be my prince.
and il be your princess

♥ 11:33 PM

AND NOW TODAY! YOU START BEING FRIENDLY!?
i dont know if youre for real or not.

♥ 10:54 PM

Thursday, January 7, 2010

70/30
Now i've just gotta decide whats what.

♥ 8:00 PM

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

I don't know what to do.

I don't even know what my options are.

♥ 11:09 PM

Monday, January 4, 2010

STUPID LOVE LETTER!

(Tis the song currently playing. But also how I feel. Stop saying sweet stuff.)

♥ 11:08 PM

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Someone.
Put the twinkle in my eye.

♥ 6:53 PM

Saturday, January 2, 2010

♥ 6:12 PM

Friday, January 1, 2010

HANGING OUT WITH ALEX IS ALWAYS INTERESTING

♥ 9:01 PM

New years was pretty fantastic!

Its been a pretty fucking downer year. But Jay (someone who doesnt exsist in the real world) and Dylan (the guy whom i watch walk to school everyday for the past 3years) made it fucking awesome.

Also, being with Alex and Jessie was cool too (:

♥ 8:35 PM